Posts Tagged ‘phone brigade’

As I traveled for work this week, I was very grateful to have a new accountability partner.  Joe checked in with me each day while I was on the road and I returned clean and sober.



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Today I am in need of the Phone Brigade! I am filled with the desire to act out … the desire to view pornography.

Today is a day where I cash in the chips of accountability.

Why do I make those phone calls day after day? So that on days like today I can make a phone call to help save me from myself. To keep me from doing the thing that I know I don’t want to do (… and yet I so much want to do it!).

Today I call for …


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From the standpoint of purity, it has been a good week, but it has not been a perfect week. I again had a slip on Monday where I made the bad decision to look at a non-pornographic web site while knowing that the discussion and pictures on this site are often arousing. In other words, I went out walking in the danger zone.

I walked into the danger zone and then I kept going. I crossed my bottom line and viewed pornographic images on the internet. So I was a loser in this week’s Battle for Purity.

But the war is not over. And there are positive signs. I have been honest. I did not try to hide this sin from myself or others. I fully disclosed my sexual sin to my accountability partners. And I have continued to make my phone calls and check-ins this week. And I have been clean every day but this past Monday.

Today is also offering encouragement. I began to feel very “slippery” around lunch time today. I began to want to go back onto the internet to look at pornography and I even began to work on justifications for this behavior in my mind.

But then I did something good — I made a phone call. I called one of my SALT Brothers and told him about my feelings, temptations, and bad thinking. We set up a fence together. I agreed to call him again this afternoon and report on my day. Knowing that I will be talking to an accountability partner this afternoon has taken all the power away from the temptation. The burden has been removed and I am free to be the person I really want to be.

So what is working? Honesty is huge. Because I told the full (and ugly) truth about my sexual sin from Monday, I was more empowered to make a phone call today. There was no rationalizing along the lines of “Well I acted out Monday so I might as well act out again today and then I can disclose it all at our next meeting.” Disclosing on Monday took away some of sin’s power over me today.

What also worked was planning during a time of strength. Our SALT Brigade had just spent time last week working on a Fire Drill (Speak, Pray, Call, Flee). When I started to feel tempted today I knew that making a call was part of the fire drill. I made the call before the temptation got to be stronger than me. And once I made the call, the temptation lost its hold over me.

That is what accountability is all about. We cannot fight sexual sin on our own (although Satan would like us to do just that). We need others. We need to share our sin so that we find out that we are not alone. And we need to make plans with others who will help hold us accountable to those plans. We need an army of men who are willing to go to battle for purifying the Bride of Christ.

Thank you, SALT Brothers!


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Flyin' Turtle

The Battle for Purity has been raging for 5 months now and I am grateful to report that this soldier has only stumbled once during that time. Five months of purity (minus one day)!!

But now it is time to prepare for an attack from the skies. Sales have picked up at my office and suddenly I have four trips planned over the next six weeks. I will be traveling to Dallas, Las Vegas, Orlando, and Austin.

Every time I leave home it is a cause for worry. I often experience a tremendous sense of loneliness when I travel – even when I am traveling with others. And there is also the anxiety of not being able to sleep. And there is unstructured time in unsupervised settings. Ample opportunity to act out, ample “justification” to act out.

So now is the time for me to make plans for these trips. We make plans during times of strength so that we may survive times of weakness. I am arranging to get help from the “Phone Brigade.” I have accountability partners who are making commitments to call me each of the days that I will be away from home. I will also check-in with my wife before I leave and let her know what the plans are. And I will commit to talking to her each night as well.

Travel has been very hard for me in the past. I am praying for comfort, peace, and a whole lot of strength for the present and future!


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D-Monk is on the road and the Phone Brigade has been activated.

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